Online reviews are dead

They had a good run. Let's say the mid-2000s until, well, today. 2005-01-01 — 2025-05-31. RIP online reviews.

Airbnb

Late last year, my family visited from the UK. We paid $5,000 to stay at this 4.88-star, 'Guest favourite' Airbnb. Looks stunning, doesn't it?

It wasn't. The kitchen was full of pots and pans that look like they'd been bought from an op shop.¹ The outside loungers were literally rotting. The 'golf course' was in comically poor form. The BBQ was missing its metal plates -- you know, the bits you cook on -- and a gas bottle. The toilet blocked. And so on.

After leaving my 3-star review, 'Harry' called me multiple times and tried to bribe me, with money, to change my review. (I have a conscience. I declined.)

Hotels

We're in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam. We booked an 8.3 'very good' hotel on Booking.com. Small, but recently refurbished, and reviews rave that it's the cleanest place and so on.

Two weeks ago, 'Lopez' from the USA, 9/10:

Best hotel slippers I’ve ever worn. Can I buy them? Asking for a friend (me)

'Barnhart' from the USA, 9/10:

A small but beautiful hotel tucked away in the city center. Super clean, friendly service, and unbeatable location.

'Janice' from New Zealand, 9/10:

The hotel was fantastic, with great service and beautiful decor.

(I'll point out that Lopez, Barnhart, and Janice are all suspiciously beautiful young ladies. This is relevant.)

We left after an hour. That is the building. Those photos were taken there at some point. But then I don't know what happened to all those soft furnishings. I don't know why there are photos of a croissant and a burrito.

The luxury you see in those photos is simply not real. I doubt it ever was.

Telegram

I'm on Telegram (for bot notifications rather than anything personal). About once a week I'll get a message from -- would you believe it -- a suspiciously beautiful young lady.

After a brief how'dyoudo?, the offer is made: do you want to make some money by reviewing online hotels? Until today I'd wondered what the scam was. What do they want from me?

Well, the answer is nothing. The scam is the other way round. I think if I say, yes, I'll take $10 to review a hotel, I might actually get the money.

Because all online reviews are now fake. They're purchased. We've known this to be the case for Amazon for years. And now it's accommodation. Gone. Dead. Useless.

Of course, AI will ruin this further and faster.

What now?

Obviously you can still trust the Hyatt. And the larger, older places that are unique to a city. If they were no good, they'd have gone out of business by now.

But if you want somewhere smaller and cheaper, I think you have to see it with your own eyes. That's what we're going to start doing: the first few days in a new city will be somewhere trustworthy but above budget. Then, with guidance from the online booking sites and individual blog posts, we're going to go and walk into places. Can we see the room? Can we make a booking here at the desk, rather than online?

I will never trust an online review again.